The End of the Pen

 This is it.

There is no graceful sign-off, no romantic bow on this chapter. I am not here to tell you I’ll be back, nor to keep the seat warm for a triumphant return. No. I am here to tell you the truth, raw and unapologetic: I’m done writing—at least for now. This is not a pause; this is a severing. A clean break for the sake of survival.

Because sometimes, if you want to live, you have to kill parts of yourself.

There’s a brutal kind of honesty in admitting that the thing that once gave you life can also start bleeding you dry. Writing was once my escape, my weapon, my therapy. Now it is a mirror I no longer recognize, a constant reminder of wounds I’ve outgrown, scars I refuse to keep reopening just to prove I can bleed beautifully.

The truth is, survival isn’t pretty. It’s desperate. It’s cutthroat. It’s making sacrifices that feel like amputations, choosing silence over self-expression, choosing to step back so those I love can step forward. Because what is life worth, if not lived in service to the people you’d burn yourself alive to protect?

I’ve learned that loving deeply comes with a cost: your comfort, your peace, sometimes even your identity. And I’m willing to pay it. I’m willing to dismantle everything I thought I was if it means building a safer, stronger future for those I love. That’s not weakness; that’s war.

So here I am, declaring the death of this chapter. The pen is set down, not out of defeat, but out of defiance. This is not about quitting. This is about choosing life. About choosing them. About choosing a future that may never see my words again but will see the people I love standing, thriving, smiling.

I won’t romanticize this choice. It’s not noble or poetic. It’s survival, plain and brutal. It’s the kind of choice that slices you open and dares you to stitch yourself back together without anesthesia. But I’ll take pain over regret any day.

So this is it. The words stop here. I walk away—not because I’ve run out of stories, but because I’ve run out of time to live them on paper. It’s time to live them in flesh and blood, in sacrifices that will never make headlines, in love so fierce it silences the need for applause.

There will be no encore. No soft landing. No lingering.

This is goodbye.

And if these are the last words I ever write, let them stand as a gravestone for a version of me that once believed she could hold the world together with ink. That woman is gone. What remains is someone harder, colder, and far more dangerous to break. Because love, when it’s real, demands blood. And I have given mine willingly. So bury this chapter deep. Forget the writer I was. If you ever see me again, you won’t recognize me.

And yet, in this silence, I hope I find the only thing I’ve been searching for all along: peace.

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From Bibi, with love